I learned a plethora of new things from 2014 things I want others to know, things I definitely don’t and things that just don’t matter. Starting in October I became a homeschool/Online high school student, contrary to popular belief it’s so far from easy it’s ridiculous.
It took some time but I learned how to teach myself, homeschooling is hard never let anyone fool you into the idea of it being easy. I spend hours in my day just trying to figure something insanely obvious out just to have an epiphany of how it’s really meant to be done. There’s no one standing there to tell you, you must do something.
So I learned how to motivate myself, if you’ve ever been a runner you’ll know telling yourself there’s ice cream at the end of a run isn’t motivation enough you have to want to run then the ice cream is a fall back in the hardest moment of the run. When the voice in the back of your mind says “You can’t do this” you respond with “But damn there’s ice cream if I do” and that’s what it’s like to self assign work. You have to have a passion at frist but when you get half way through and you’re having the worst time you’ve got to be able to say “But there’s ice cream at the end” or “But you can go on a three-hour Tumblr binge after this” there has to be a fall back motivation.
THe last point I’ll make is about why I chose to leave public school, I tell everyone when they ask “Why online school?” that I hate people but that’s not really the truth, I hate what they think life is. I can’t stand going to school with people who think life is easy as ABC, go to school, get good grades, go to the right university, get the best job, have a perfect family. That’s not life that’s living by a manuscript, sure some people are happy living like that but what says you can’t be 30 and go on an adventure? Why do you have to be a reckless teen? Maybe at this point in my life I want to settle down make a living and then go off on an adventure, doesn’t it make more sense to build a foundation before the house?
Am I crazy?
All my love, a very muddled Teenage Catastrophe, Elizabeth.